BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
(FOUR) GONZO
I could have gone with the chef, the old guys, Beeker, the old stoner jazz band, or any of the more “underground” characters. I know my Muppets and I appreciate all of the characters on a certain level, but let’s be real here. You’re only saying you like the less popular and more obscure characters to sound cool and unique. Whatevs. I’m going classic here. For that reason, I’m going with Gonzo as my number four. He’s weird and neurotic. He’s like the George Costanza of the Muppet crew. For some reason he’s been dressing really weird lately though. I dunno about that.
(THREE) ANIMAL
You gotta love Animal. He’s part Muppet and part pet. He’s like an undomesticated Muppet. He was raised by Muppet wolves and doesn’t speak real English. He looks like a cross between Cousin It and George Carlin. He plays the drums too so you know he’s not coasting on his Muppet name.
(TWO) FOZZY
Fozzy Bear is awesome. He’s a comedian who sucks. You can tell he has worked some really shady places and has seen some serious shit. You can tell he has some issues and some personal drama in his past. To get over this emotional hump and to feel loved he is a comedian. He fails more often than not, but doesn’t let it faze him. I’m pretty sure he’s into heavy drugs and hates himself. This is why WE need to love him. It’s life or death!
(ONE) KERMIT
Kermit is the icon. I think I’d rather hang out with Kermit more than Mickey Mouse, but maybe not as much as Bugs Bunny. I’ve been a Kermit and Muppet fan since birth. I think we all were. People are quick to let old cartoon stuff like Disney and Looney Toon roll of their backs as they get older. People stick with Kermit. We know he’s a puppet, but he ignore it. Kermit is a pop culture icon and easily the best Muppet by default.
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