BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
(FOUR) THE SHINS
I’m fairly certain it’s illegal to listen to The Shins and work heavy machinery. There was one song by The Shins that I sorta liked and then I realized that it wasn’t The Shins at all. The Shins make low-fi independent music that sounds like an indie band trying really hard not to wake up a grumpy baby. Damn, hipsters!
(THREE) SEETHER
It’s like Three Doors Down bought one of the worst Korn CDs they could find and decided to copy it and water it down. Seether is shit. I’ve seen them in concert and it was one of the lamest performances I’ve ever seen. Proof that mediocrity makes me sleepy.
(TWO) BLINK 182
The whiney ass voice of Blink 182 makes me want to punch small children. How could anyone ever enjoy this pop-punk crap? They were a late 90’s novelty band that convinced a lot of dumb kids that they actually had something to say of substance. I have never met a cool and/or sane person who proclaimed “I love Blink 182!” Blink 182 is like NyQuil for the brain. If you listen for a little while your thought process will eventually go to sleep on you.
(ONE) WEEZER
I don’t hate Weezer at all. I like “Buddy Holly” and a few of their big singles, but all in all they are a pretty boring band. I’ve never listened to Weezer and found myself overly excited or anything. I watch or listen intently and I’m always disappointed. I never got the all the hoopla Weezer got in the past. Again, I’m not hating. I just don’t get it or connect with them really at all.
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