BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
(FOUR) WILL SMITH
I used to be a fan of Will Smith. I loved “Fresh Prince”, “Independence Day”, and really a lot of his work. Then I noticed something that others noticed much sooner than me. He actually sucks. A good actor will get lost in a role and make you enjoy the movie for it is. When you see Will Smith in a movie now a days it’s just Will Smith in a movie. He does nothing to show any REAL vulnerability. It’s the same contrived bullshit. He just doesn’t get his hands dirty. The closest I’ve seen in recent years was “Hancock”, and that was still a little underwhelming.
(THREE) BACKGAMMON
What the hell is backgammon. Why do their boards come in cool looking little brief cases? What’s with the little triangles? There’s dice too? What the hell IS this? I’m fairly certain it’s only played by Republicans.
(TWO) SIDE-BOOB EXCITEMENT
We have the internet and television. When did this whole craze about “side boob” become so popular? If a woman wears a top or dress that reveals the side of breast it’s now some kind of big deal. Granted, I’m all for it, but why get all excited? It’s not my preference, but dude’s wear tank tops and no one says anything. It’s a weird double standard… and it’s creepy. Being so specific about a boob is weird. Good boobs are good boobs. We can see them on TV and the internet. What’s with this side-boob jazz? Gah!
(ONE) PUBLIC SPANKING/DISCIPLE
A parent should have the right to disciple their kid for sure. Kids get bratty and out of line and they need to be molded into being respectful adults. It’s the just extent that irks me. It’s those loud trashy mothers who beat the hell out of their kids in grocery stores. It’s the dumb ass dad who screams at a kid for some kind of yard work error. It always sucks to see these people out there. It’s just really uncomfortable for everyone. You look like a jerk and it’s an emotional nuisance to have to witness a kid getting physically or excessively verbally abused. It makes the adult look really low-class and bad. Spanking a kid in public is like trying to watch an adult suck at reading.
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