BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
(FOUR) JOHNNY 5
SHORT CIRCUIT - 2011 will mark TWENTY FIVE YEARS since this comedy gold was unleashed on us. Voiced by Tim Blaney, Designed by Syd Mead, and loved by every “80’s kid” alive. This movie spun off a sequel and for a few years “Johnny 5” was a huge part of pop culture. “Johnny 5” was awesome because he taught us how important it is to be alive and that referencing old movies in ironic ways can in fact be a life style.
(THREE) BENDER
FUTURAMA - You’re thinking, “That’s a cheap pick… Bender is a television robot”. So what? There were also FOUR “Direct-to-DVD” MOVIES! Two of them even had Bender’s name in them. That SO counts. Let’s be realistic here, Bender is awesome. He’s the coolest robot to appear in both a movie and a television show that’s for sure. Voiced by John DiMaggio, created by Matt “I Made The Simpsons Too” Groening, and has become somewhat of an icon. Futurama was cancelled by FOX, the movies were made and had success, and then Comedy Central picked the show up for another 26 half hours worth of episodes. Yeah, the writing, talent, and all that helped but it was the gigantic nerd-gasim that was had over Bender and the show AFTER it was on. We’re back for a little more as of now, but if we all actually watch this time hopefully that’ll roll over into more and more. More Bender = Good.
(TWO) T-800
TERMINATOR 2: JUDGMENT DAY - This is the one Arnold Schwarzenegger played and not the cool liquefying T-1000 that Robert Patrick played. The T-1000 was good visuals, but the T-800 was the ideal robot friend. Hell, I had the movie poster featuring Arnold as the T-800 on my childhood wall for years. Robots are normally sleek little wimps or bad guys. 800 was a bad ass that you end up having more than enough emotion for the both of you. The words “I’ll be back” will forever be warped into an impersonation of Arnold in this classic. It’s probably my pick for best action movie of all time, so that has to count for something.
(ONE) EVIL BILL AND TED
BILL AND TED’S BOGUS JOURNEY - The sequel to “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” was more than a time traveling, life and death masterpiece. The movie also has “stations” and “robot us’”. The robots here came in two forms. The good robot us’ that Bill and Ted get help from the stations in making is what saves the day, but the evil robot Bill and Ted were much cooler. They could take their eyes out to contact their boss, take off their heads for a good game of house basketball, and did their best to hit cats when landing their phone booth. I wouldn’t want to hang out with them, but a reality show staring “Evil Bill and Evil Ted” would pretty much be the snottiest, jerkiest, and despicable show since whatever’s not quite as bad as “Jersey Shore”.
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