BY MIKEY MIGO
I’m fairly certain MTV had an award show this past Sunday. I mean I tuned in and what something reminiscent of a red carpet pre show and then I watched this show where people gave awards to people. I’m still not sure what I saw was an award show. I’m not going to tell you that “MTV should show more music! Waah! Waah! Waah!” or “I was so much better in the 90’s! Blah! Blah! Blah!”. Times change. I get that. I’m sure folks older than me would say the best years were the 80’s and those younger and way dumber than me would talk up the 00’s. MTV changed its name from “Music Television” to just the letters “MTV” not so long ago. So with that do we even need these award shows anymore? Why not just go three hours and do a music AND movie award show?
It’s sad to think that there is only a VERY mild difference between the award winners, presenters, and performances of the MTV Award Show and the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards. I remember when hip hop was edgy and something with substance or balls. It’s crazy to think that in 2011 it would be the hip hop genre to completely neuter MTV. Besides some old familiar faces, too many people on this award show were from kid shows on Disney, Nick, or reality shows. Jay Z and Kanye West exhibited why hip hop artists are typically weak live performers. I love Jay Z’s work, but for Kanye to seem boring he has to be a huge succubus of energy. When did we decide Rick Ross was relevant? What happened to the real artists? Why did those Odd Future/Tyler The Creator little kids have to go the homophobic route during the preshow and the “I keep it real so I cuss a lot and ‘act a fool’” shtick when he won the award of death to get attention? They aren’t my cup of tea, but a friend and I both expected them do to SOMETHING “outrageous”. Yawn. Nicki Minaj is a stupid person that makes stupid music for stupid people.
Lady Gaga’s “guy character” looks like actor Adam Goldberg. Seriously, take a few minutes and watch him from “Dazed and Confused” and tell me you don’t notice the similarity. Her whole shtick was one of the most pretentious attempts at “performance art” I’ve ever seen. She stepped all over Britney’s acceptance, which I don’t care really, but still. It was hammy as hell. And by “hammy” I don’t mean “H.A.M” or whatever dumbass people are using as “hip” slang these days. C’mon, Gaga... Just put on the Kermit dress and shut up. Yeesh!
I don’t think Jonah Hill “lost” any weight. He knows exactly what doctor’s office he left it at.
The Amy Winehouse tribute was pretty cool. Russell Brand was the best choice to handle it. He didn’t blindly kiss her post-mortem ass, he told the truth and used her story to make an attempt to reach out for those who could be having the same problems. I pretty much agree with everything he said. She was crazy, sure, but she was also a vocal genius. The rest is just TMZ folklore.
Adele’s performance was a bright spot. She has great voice and I enjoy her work. Sadly her presence wasn’t enough to make me feel like my time wasn’t wasted… again. I should have learned my lesson by now. Like the great Roger Murtaugh once said… “I’m too old for this shit!”
Does the MTV Award gift bag come with a new soul to replace the old sold one?
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